Week Three - Job Review WooHoo!

This week I had my annual job review.  I’ve been there less than a full year so it was a surprise.  When I left the review, my cheeks were still pink from blushing at the compliments.... seriously.  I think I fell between commendable and distinguished, closer to the higher of the two.  The review was above and beyond kind, it also reinforced some of those gifts I knew I had inside, growing mold, pleading to be used.  I hadn’t put them into practice for 20 long months.  Somehow, saying 20 “months” seems gentler than the reality of being unemployed for two “years”.  I could go into my diatribe about folks who have escaped the ravages of recession, and their insensitivity and arrogance at thinking it could never happen to them....Their indifference, some condemnation, failure to reach out, and lack of compassion, I later discovered could have been their way of sheltering their egos from the possibility and fear, they too weren’t immune to walking in my shoes.  It clearly did sort out those who unconditionally loved and cared for me, from the chaff. It’s good to know who you can count on to be in the bunker with you when the enemy attacks.  I did that for a very long time though, dwelled on my misfortune.  What I now know, there is just no space for that kind of self-pity, anger and regret in my world.  I may try to slip into, just to get the feelings out, but it’s just not my size anymore.  I think I’ve outgrown it, expanded;  because I need bigger space for all the blessings coming my way.   There was a reason I was unemployed for almost two years and it was a part of God’s plan for my life. 

  

Years ago, caught up in the pressures, politics, and protocols of Management and a Corporate environment, I used to joke with my husband and friends about getting that “ bit of fluff job”, someday.  Now, I assumed that would come in semi-retirement, not with ten years left to work, but there is this saying, “Watch what you wish for.”  

This job is that bit of fluff job.  This job allows me to use some of my strongest talents as well as compliments my highest self.   I look forward to walking into work every day.  This job allows me to serve others, by smiling, going the extra mile to help them, and practice what I preach about providing outstanding customer service. This job puts me into contact with people who just wanna have fun... just like me!  This job allows me to invest some of my work day immersed in my passion; crafting a story, planting ideas, and creating an image.   Best of all, this job allows me the time to pursue my Big Dream, on the side.  

I had to learn in the past two years to let go of the fears. The major ones of course;  financial security, health, well-being, loneliness and lack. I needed to learn most things are out of our control, specifically when it comes to other people, places and things.  I had to learn its an illusion to think that we can take care of ourselves in a manner which leads to our best selves.  That’s the role of our Higher Power if we let Him.  His plan for us is so much bigger, and grander than we can ever imagine. I had to learn if we aren’t on the right path, we’re often broken open, first to get our attention, and then to scrap out the yuck and replace it with all the goodness and riches God wants us to have. I had to learn to just stop...... take the time to listen to my intuitions, watch, be mindful of not only how things felt inside my heart, but also pay close attention to the world around me, harvesting the  messages meant for me. 

I had to learn to trust that all of my needs would be met, always. 

This week I was reminded of all of these things.   Thirty-five years of working.... I have never had a job review that meant as much to me as this one.   

WooHoo!